Domi meets Amalia - June 22, 2008

A baby story

When I was on bedrest pregnant with Domingo I spent countless hours on the couch watching these baby being born stories, mostly of baby animals, but it's all the same. I mean how much cuter is a baby alpaca than a baby human, quite a bit actually. This time around I didn't have a chance to do any of that, thank GOD, since everything was a-okay and when I wasn't at work, I was running around after Domi. But I figure I had better post about Amalia's birth before I forget what happened and the story takes on a life of it's own.
So we begin at around 35 weeks, you guys know what's going on, I went to the OB she says I'm 3cm dilated, but high, so it could happen sooner rather than later, don't take any long trips, you probably won't make it to your due date kind of thing.
Well, even though Chris was desperately trying to get me to knock off work early, I stuck it out through my trial advocacy training that will free me up of all my continuing legal education credits for next year, for FREE! Awesome.
The whole time I'm in the training, watching videos of myself do openings, closings, direct exams etc. I'm keep aware of the fact that I'm HUGELY pregnant not only by the VIDEO they make of my giant self, but by my instructors who keep asking me not to go into labor during their portion of the class. Funny. Funny the first time, and the 50th, in fact it keeps getting funnier.
Anyway, so as to not disappoint, the last day at the trial in the court room of the Daley Center, I'm sitting at the table squirming in discomfort as my colleague has a really hard time with his direct exam. I feel kind of like the den mother since all of my team mates were very new attorneys, and I would run up and give little pointers every now and then. Kind of obnoxious, but I can't stand to see people struggle. Well, I'm sitting there and all of a sudden I feel like I've just peed myself. I got up and ran to the judge's bathroom, because Dear GOD, now on top of everything else, I'm incontinent? How embarrassing. So I get to the bathroom and realize, hey that's not pee. Thank God I'm not incontinent, I mean how embarrassing. Then I realize that this means that my water broke and I have to go back out there an announce to the entire room that I have to go to the hospital. HOW EMBARRASSING!!! So I try to be as discrete as possible and say in a very quiet voice to my supervisor (who is acting as judge) that I have to go to the hospital right now. He stands up and is like "oh my God, oh my God!" so everyone in the room starts freaking out and laughing and wishing me luck etc. As someone who really does not like to be the center of attention (really, I'm not just saying that) it was pretty brutal.
So I got in a cab to the hospital because Chris as it turns out, decided to go to Oak Park with Domi and visit the primos. He was in a state because Jennifer was not answering her phone, and Max had taken Theo to his baseball game and no one was around! Finally he got a hold of Max who came right home and took charge of the kids and Chris raced to the hospital. He had Heather come to the hospital just in case he didn't make it so I wouldn't be alone.
No need to fear it turned out, I was still in triage when he got there and the resident was actually doubting whether my water had broken. I was joking with the nurses that if there were no baby to be had that day, everyone was to pretend that I had had the baby as I would NOT be going back to work having to tell the whole agency that I had in fact just peed myself. Well, when the resident checked me I was 5-6 cm so she said I wouldn't be going anywhere regardless. I was right by the way, my water had broken, so there resident!
They kept asking me what I was planning on doing for pain, I kept to the script, that if I felt the need, if they had to augment the labor or do something else that made hypno-birthing difficult then I would make the decision at that time, but since I really wasn't that uncomfortable I would just leave it alone.
Up to L&D...
So we got a "good" room. Having a family member who worked in the hospital has it's perks! Once we were there though, play time was over. I was happily chatting with Chris and Heather, making plans about who was going to pick up Domingo, how it was going to work, calling my parents having them come in to stay with Domi etc. and the nurse and doctor show up, oh by the way, my doctor was away on vacation OF COURSE! so I was left with this woman I had never met before. She was actually very nice, but I was thoroughly annoyed that my OB had the nerve to go away with her family for the weekend, I mean seriously, people are just not professional these days. (She actually called me and was like, "I'm going to kill you, we went on a short weekend trip rather than to Phoenix because I figured that you wouldn't go until the end of the week!")
Anyway the doctor was like, "I want you to lay on your side, but not all the way on your side, half way between on your side and not, so one leg is in the air, there perfect. Baby doesn't like when you sit up". Huh. Well, Mama doesn't like laying on her side, it happens to hurt like a mother.
With every contraction Amalia's heart rate would decelerate and as soon as it was over it would come right back up. So what's the big deal right, it's coming back up? Apparently it was a big deal to them. Moving from side to side, oxygen mask over my face, electrode in my poor baby's head, I was completely annoyed. In my head (and out loud) I was saying, "this is why people want home births, don't like interventions like fetal monitors etc. of course the heart rate is going to go down with the contractions! This is why I didn't want to come in to the hospital right away. This is why people need to take drugs, this is what's wrong with the medical system" blah blah.
I started hearing strains of "going up the country" as I fumed and breathed deeply between bites of popsicle. I had asked earlier when the last time I could eat something was, and the nurse was like, yeah, not until the baby is here. ARGH! I should've stopped for a cheeseburger. But the doc. took pity, or thought I needed some sugar, so said I could have some icy pop, yeah.
As the doctor checked me again and again, I was so uncomfortable I wanted to scream. I really wanted to say, ok, let's get on that epidural train asap. But before I could make that call, the doctor said I was 8cm and baby's head was coming down. Doc kept reaching in and stretching me out, I was NOT pleased, but kept to the deep breathing between pained squeals and whines. So too late for the epidural!
Well, 10 minutes and about 3 good pushes later, Amalia was out and screaming like a banshee. The cord was wrapped around her neck and body like a weird alien python- hence the decels. Let me just say there is NOTHING like the feeling of your baby's body coming slipping through after her giant head comes out. It is incredible. It is surreal, and then when you hear her little cry for the first time, it's amazing.
In retrospect, I was saying, why on earth would I not get drugs. Any birth with a healthy baby is the key, so why go through all that pain? Especially since the whole system is set up with that in mind. I was so uncomfortable, and made more so by the needs of the doctor. My instincts said get up, get up, sit up, squat use GRAVITY! and the doctor made me lay down and stay down. Why, so she could see better, not because it's easier that way. When my body said push push push, the doctor said, hold on, I need to break the bed. When my body said rest a second, the doctor and nurse said push push push. It was so irritating. If I had had pain meds, I would need their coaching, I wouldn't mind being completely prone.
But...
After thinking about it, I think I might have ended up with a c-section if drugs had delayed the labor because with law-suit wary OBs, they just can't take the chance that everything is fine. And the chain of interventions would be complete.
So fine hippies. You win. My next baby will be born by squatting in the back of a VW van, the air hazy with patchouli stink, Uncle John's Band in the back ground and my long haired hippy children in attendance.
Actually, I think we'll call it success with these two guys. I mean, what more could I possibly ask for?

Post partum post

Amalia doesn't want to hear it.

So Chris was getting all over me to post something!! And I was all like, um, hello? baby just born, must nurse and then sleep or loose my mind.
But in actuality, it hasn't been all that bad. Amalia is a week and 2 days old already, and it's only going to get easier... and harder.

My first impressions this time around are just that. It's easier and harder. It's easier because I just look over at Domingo and realize, "Hey, I can do this! There is the living proof." It's harder because I just look over at Domingo and he's swimming, playing, reading, or crying and I'm attached to a teeny little being who just sleeps poops and cries, and I can't be there the same way for him, or for her for that matter.
Amalia is doing really well. She isn't as jaundiced as Domingo, not by a long shot. I think she may just avoid the whole "breast milk jaundice" thing and we won't have to fight anyone about breast feeding this time around. She is a little peanut, and unlike Domingo, did not surpass her birth weight within the first week. We have another doctor appointment/weight check next week and I'm pretty confident she'll be up past her birth weight by then. (She was only 3 ounces short last time, and she had peed and pooped and I hadn't fed her again which I SWEAR is like at least a 3 or 4 ounce swing). It is so satisfying to see her little thighs plumping up almost before my very eyes, to see her develop a little double chin and chubby cheeks, and to turn from a tree-frog baby into a little toad baby. It's awesome. The other thing that is so great is the little sleep smiles that she gives you, they are THE BEST thing EVER. If I were a really dedicated blogger, I'd have the camera trained on her 24/7 just to make sure to capture it on film. It's the little things like that, that you forget about until of course you see it again in a teeny little baby. You forget how sweet the sleep-smiles are, how painful nursing is at first, how stressful the weight-check can be, how much newborns sleep! And then it's over in a flash. In a few short months she will be a totally different entity.

Like these little monkeys.

The good thing is, I think as time goes by, it'll get easier. We'll get the hang of nursing (she's already figured out how to latch on laying down which is HUGE), she'll gain weight and be able to go longer without eating, so I won't be such a zombie in the morning, but then I'm sure it'll get harder too because she'll be more awake and alert and in need of stimuli so running around after Domingo will be a trick.
Domi overall as been a wonder. Yes, he's a little whinier than before, he's more likely to cry when he doesn't get his way these days, he even grabbed a pacifier that was out and was chewing on it for a day (the first time in his life a pacifier was in his mouth for more than a nanosecond. grrrr.) and he is a willful as he ever was, but he is so sweet and excited about "la hermanita".
He comes into the room in the morning when I'm still sleeping with Amalia and he smiles and squeals with delight "there's the little sister!", "there's Amalia Mafalda!" like it's been ages since he's seen her. He wants to touch her, and imitates the little squeaks and grunts that she makes and laughs hysterically when she opens her eyes and looks at him. It's amazing. And an incredible relief. Not that the sibling rivalry will never come, just that at least the beginning transition isn't as shocking and difficult as I had feared.
It's pretty wild, you worry and wonder for those 9 1/2 months, what will this baby look like, what will she be like, will I be able to love her as much as my other child, will my feelings for my first child change, dear God how am I going to handle TWO BABIES? AHHHHH! etc. etc. until the big day arrives, and all those worries take a back seat to being in the moment, and the moment is actually really good, better than you had thought it could be.
Human beings are really incredible. Our capacity for love is truly infinite, that amazes me. Looking at these guys, it really shouldn't.

Compare and contrast

I realize that most new borns look pretty similar 5 minutes out of the packaging, but I'm going to stand by my original statement that these guys look nothing a like. Um, well, not exactly alike anyway.

She's Here!

Amalia Mafalda!


This is also how I felt but I wasn't allowed to show it.

Amalia was very nice to her mother and came out on June 21, 2 weeks and one day early. Before she bulked up too much, 6 lbs 12.5 oz.; 21 in. Chris says that I'm a machine for churning out long skinny babies with about as much notice as a cat. Another speedy delivery. I should work for Dominos.



Ah, much better.


Hmm, I don't know about this.


Oh well, I guess we can keep her.


First trip to Morris.

Ever the boy scouts - Amalia leaves the hospital in the hosiptal shirt, diaper and hat. What, did you think I had packed a bag or something?

Ok, a more detailed birth story to follow, it's a loo loo.
Also, thinking up alternative titles to the blog, Do'Malia's World? Am-Mingo's World? We'll keep working on it.

Still here!

Well after much prognostication about an early delivery, I had another OB appointment yesterday and she said, you're not going anywhere. Meaning, no baby today. I don't know if she was trying to soothe me because she's about to go on vacation (ACK!) or if she really meant it, but she said I'm 4cm; 50% and baby's head is still high-ish (-3, for those in the know).
WELL CRAP.
I had a little bit of a hyperventilation yesterday when she said that the uterus was measuring smaller than 2 weeks ago, and "I'm just gonna send you down for another ultrasound". WHAT? I know most people love the ultrasounds, and I do too when it's just a chance to spy on the little bun in the oven, like when Leticia is doing it. But when the doc. says, let's just go have a look, I'm NOT excited. I'm petrified. After being talked off the ledge by Leticia, we went in yesterday, I was fully prepared for them to say, baby's not growing, let's induce. But I had a weird sense of calm and I just knew that everything was fine.
Come to find out, that this baby looks like a super-chunk. At 37w3d, the ultrasound measures at over 7.5 pounds. I know that these can be off, but even just looking at the pictures, this child has CHUB! Chub on her legs and chub in her cheeks! Yikes. So I have no idea why I'm measuring smaller than dates (I feel like I've got a beach ball in front) maybe it's just how she was positioned, but according to the ultrasound tech, the baby looks "perfect". Ahh. That is exactly what I wanted to hear. That and, you'll be going into labor before your doctor leaves on Monday. Oh, and here you've just won the lottery. But one out of three is not too bad.

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!!!

To all the Papas out there. Hope you had a wonderful day.
We had a very nice time hanging out with Grandma and Farfar and had dinner with Hez and James.
I must admit, my father's day was not all I was hoping for. I had secretly had this idea in my head forever. My total plan was to go into labor and have this baby while there were family members around this weekend so 1.) this baby could've been born Father's day, how awesome would that be? 2.) we were totally full term 37 weeks yesterday so no one could say we were pretermers and 3.) so we'd have people here ready to take Domingo and not have to deal with midnight phone calls to Hez or Jennifer or Liz Karina and pray they make it here before baby A is born in the shower, or worse, the car. I wasn't planning on getting it detailed again before we hand it off to Grandma and Farfar.
But last time around I seem to remember willing myself to go into labor by Sept. 1 so Domingo could at least have the option of starting school when he was 5 rather than 6, and we all know how that worked out. But what are you going to do? The best laid plans I tell you. We have another Doc. appointment on Wednesday, we'll see if all these insane contractions every night are doing anything, or if I'll just keep on the same way until July.